You Rock Or You Suck - The Internal Dialog Of An Entrepreneur
"You Rock" or "You Suck." Enter the daily internal dialog of entrepreneurs, "solopreneuers," and people working for themselves, by themselves or starting their own business everywhere.
It can be a lonely gig sometimes. A gig I wouldn't trade for anything… but it's sure as hell, not all sunshine, unicorns, Lambos, and seven-figure months working from Bali. That is total social media BS btw.
The media, magazines, consultants, and experts often focus on operations, processes, or strategy. Entrepreneurs blindly seek the silver bullet, magical hack, tip, trick, process, tool, or tactic that will give them the mythical "4 Hour Work Week" "I'm one funnel away." "Maybe if I get a virtual assistant."
However, nobody talks about the challenges surrounding mindset when you work for yourself.
The angel and devil constantly battling in your head. The dueling voices. The dirty bits.
We see entrepreneurs glamorized, celebrated, and lauded as badass mavericks, independent free-spirited risk-takers.
"Hell yeah"… at times.
What they don't tell you is that no matter how large your ego is, no matter how confident you are, no matter how much you believe in yourself and your vision… there are moments when you seriously think to yourself, "WTF am I doing?"
And you don't want to tell anyone.
There are days when I feel like a badass, the cock of the walk, the master of the universe, unstoppable, bullet-proof, and ten feet tall. "Look at the Big Brain on Brad" YOU f..ing ROCK!
Then there are days when I feel like the village idiot second-guessing myself, in full-blown imposter syndrome, comparing myself to others, wondering how that "no talent ass clown" I saw online makes it work, yet I'm struggling. Stop what you're doing; nobody is interested. You SUCK!
Fortunately, I have more "I rock" days than "I suck" days.
The fact is, some days you rock and some days you suck, and both are normal. You aren't alone.
But here is the truth that took me years to discover… and I still struggle to remind myself occasionally.
· Your worth, your value, your contributions, YOU aren't defined by your best day or your worst day.
· You aren't defined by whether your project, deal, idea, decision, or business works or not.
· You aren't defined by your income or whether you always know what you're doing, have the perfect answer, or get it right every single time.
· You aren't defined by whether every call, pitch, sale, launch, campaign, or meeting is a success.
· You aren't defined by whether you have a day where you rock, or you suck.
Each of us has a life, relationships, and areas beyond our career or business where we bring value, joy, love, meaning, support, and contribution.
And if the people around you judge or love you conditionally or their happiness, loyalty, or pleasure with you is based on your success, then you need to surround yourself with new people.
As I started out saying, It can be a lonely gig, and you don't have room, time, or mental bandwidth for shitty people in your life - but you still need people.
That's why you need to surround yourself with people who "get you," who get what you're going through, who applaud and support you or your vision, or who simply love you for you… unconditionally, just as you are.
Whether it is friends, a mastermind, peers, or a new love or partner, get some positive, loving people in your life. I did this year, and it's life-changing.
But ultimately, it's only you in the arena.
And sometimes it's hard to keep coming back, to keep answering the bell, especially when you experience a setback, indecision, doubt, or the "well-intentioned" opinions of others like, "Have you thought about getting a real job" (F… them by the way)
In the end, I show up. I answer the bell, and I come back for more every damn day.
I always come back. I come back like an addict, like a gambler.
Why?
Because I will ALWAYS bet on me.
Despite those moments when I play small or let the false voices of doubt let me think, "You suck," I want the f…ing ball, I want to take the shot because I KNOW I've got this!
And if I miss (which happens sometimes), I still want the damn ball and will take the shot again — My shot.
Nobody can or will do it for me. That's why people like me do what we do. It's in my DNA, as Gary Vee says.
I don't know if or when the voice ever goes away. I don't think it really does. It just lies dormant. But those moments when it says, "You suck" or I begin to doubt or play small, I stop and remember, Everything is going to be ok because I know how the story ends.
I don't use that phrase flippantly or often. It's reserved for only one other important area of my life that I know is meant to be.
How do I know how the story ends?
I know because I'm the author, and I'm writing my story every day.
And of course, because "I ROCK!" … and so do you.
Bradley
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