No Grown Woman Wants To “Hang Out” Date Her!
News Flash! No Grown Woman Wants to “Hang Out”
You know who wants to hang out, get together, go do something, run around, meet up, Netflix and chill? 18-year-old boys and college students.
Do you know who doesn’t want to hang out? Grown ass women.
But sadly, the bar for grown men, chivalry, gentlemanly, well-mannered behavior, or merely doing the right thing has been lowered significantly.
It is not uncommon for some adult men in their 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, who are educated, successful and who seemingly have their shit together, to treat dating a woman as though it were a casual meetup at a frat house mixer. Ok, that may be extreme, but I’m not far off. Ladies chime in here. Tell me if I’m wrong.
Women want to be pursued, wooed, treated with respect, communicated with… they want to be dated.
Yet telling a woman, “let’s hang out”, whether it’s delivered as,” let's get together," "run around," “do something,” etc. is the path of least resistance and the lazy man's way out.
It is a perfect example of “mailing it in” and failing to show up as a man. And it’s become too familiar.
This is not rocket science. But you’d be surprised at how few men follow through, so when a man does these simple things, he comes off like a "Hall of Famer," “a keeper,” he’s a damn unicorn.
This doesn’t mean going over the top or planning an elaborate or expensive date that resembles a “Bachelor” episode, like feeding reindeer in Norway and drinking champagne out of an antler or some BS like that. It doesn’t even mean spending $100 on drinks.
It means instead of saying “let’s hang out,” you man up, open up, and communicate by saying, "I would like to take you out on a date” or "I’d like to spend some time with you."
It means put some thought into it. Communicate before the day you're supposed to go out (really communicate, as in on the phone), don’t flake, be present and in the moment. Have details. You know, be a grown ass man who wants to spend real time with a woman.
· Women want a man with a plan… not a perfect plan, just a plan.
· Women want a man to call not text
· Women want a man to communicate with them before the day of the date.
· Women want a man who won’t flake, cancel or leave her wondering, guessing, or waiting.
· Women want a man to show up and be present
· Women want a man to put some thought into something.
· Women want a man who wants to spend time with them and make an effort to do so.
· Women want a man to be…. a man.
Now look, I’m not perfect, I’ve had my grand moments of “douchebaggery” and mailing it in, and there is a line of women in Dallas who would agree. Regrettable, but true. I learned this lesson the hard way and do things very differently now. But there have been times when I wasn’t the best man I could be and one time in particular when I didn’t give a woman the time, respect, attention, and planning she deserved because I was lazy. We “hung out” a lot. In retrospect, I wasted her time and should have been kicked to the curb.
If this sounds like you or you want to "hang out,” or be in a relationship with an amazing grown woman without intention or purpose… set her free to be with a man that will date her and do the job properly.
This goes for being married too! The strongest, happiest, coolest (and probably most sexed up) couples I know are ones where the man still dates his wife or partner on the regular year after year. He earns her every day.
Ladies, you have some work to do too. Don’t get mad. It’s true. Sometimes inadvertently women condone or allow this behavior. How? By not keeping him on his toes. Give a lazy man a way out, and he’ll take it. Ladies, if your man (or potential man) is not stepping up, arriving without a plan or mailing it in… try this. Ask him as sweetly as you wish, "What do you have planned for us?” It’s subtle but SO effective. A good man will pick up on it and rise to the occasion. If he doesn’t pay attention, read between the lines, listen, or step up… find a new man that will.
Tell me what you think? Ladies, do you agree? Guys, yes these things will help you to stand out, impress her, and make her happy, which are all good things. But these things should become second nature to you because it’s the right thing to do, it’s what a gentleman does, it’s what a grown ass man does.
Bradley
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